Raising children or tending to aging parents demands time, money and resources. The situation is especially daunting for those who work full-time. But, for a growing number of Americans, there’s a new challenge emerging: providing care for an elderly parent while raising kids. As boomers have postponed childbirth into their 30s and 40s and life spans have increased, some find themselves helping their children with the homework while assisting parents or other relatives with housework…or medical care.
Experts have labeled this group the “sandwich generation.” According to Margaret Neal and Leslie Hammer, both professors at Portland State University in Oregon and authors of Working Couples Caring for Children and Aging Parents: Effects on Work and Well-being, about 9 percent to 13 percent of U.S. households with two or more people age 30 to 60 tend to elders at least three hours a week while raising children. Another study found that 77 percent of Americans expect to care for an older loved one within the next five years and 70 percent who do provide care must take time off from work.
It’s no small matter. “Working couples report greater stress, increased levels of work-family conflict, slightly higher levels of depression and, in some cases, financial challenges…Maintaining a job while managing family responsibilities has become a major issue for much of today’s workforce,” Hammer explains.
Although caregiving has always existed, it’s affecting more people…and impacting them more profoundly, says Donna L. Wagner, a professor at Towson University in Maryland and director of the school’s gerontology program. Not only have basic demographics changed, more women have entered the workplace, families are more dispersed and many workers have no financial net to fall back on. They simply can’t take time off—even with the Family and Medical Leave Act (which provides 12 weeks annual unpaid leave for a birth or family health condition).
Too often, individuals caught in the middle find themselves unprepared to deal with the mélange of practical and emotional issues caregiving brings. Already stressed with work and children, time and energy are at a premium. Meanwhile, “Many individuals aren’t equipped to handle the role reversal of becoming a parent to their parent,” states Carol Abaya, a nationally syndicated newspaper columnist and expert of aging. Coping with financial and legal issues as well as juggling phone calls, visits, and in-home care can affect work and relationships,” Abaya says.
For those recareering, it’s vital to examine a caregiving situation prior to making any major change. A couple—or family—may need to share the responsibility (including children helping out). In addition, you may benefit by attending school or training sessions online or finding a flexible education option. Finally, you should consider an employer that allows a flexible or alternative schedule or offers personal days or dependent care assistance. Children’s Memorial Hospital in Chicago, for example, pays for up to 80 hours per year of in-home care for family members.
The bottom line on the front lines of work? Caregiving shouldn’t stop you from recareering, but it is something you must consider—and plan around—if you want to successfully negotiate a change.
Recent Comments